i've been dreaming of the things i learned about a boy who's bleeding celebrate to elevate the joy is not the same without the pain ipso facto using up your oxygen you know i'm shallow calling out for extra help you've got to let me in or let me out something to talk about yeah, something to talk about i've been dreaming of the things i learned about a boy who's leaving nothing else to chance again you've got to let me in or let me out something to talk about yeah, something to talk about

Taking a small break in wrapping up our move out of our San Mateo house yesterday, i bought myself a copy of the San Jose Mercury News and immediately flipped to the sports page (of course). After getting my fill of Sunday's NFL happenings, i perused the front page and was drawn to an exposee on the battle of Fallujah. I started reading and quickly found it was a piece written by an American reporter following Alpha Company, a squad of Marines sent into the insurgent city. You can find the whole three part report online here. It's a real eye-opening piece about exactly what our soldiers are being put through. It's remarkably free of political comment, focusing on the backgrounds of the individual soldiers and their attitudes toward life in the military and their rebel enemies. The article doesn't pull punches ... racism and brutality is represented within our ranks much as it was during the Vietnam war. However the writing definitely provides much needed perspective for those of us thousands of miles away debating whether we should be fighting this war at all.

So i had the misfortune to see the video for that god-awful Green Day song "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" last weekend. Comically bad. Billy Joe strolls along, thumbing through his mental thesaurus for more ways of saying he's all by his lonesome, and all the while HIS TWO FRIGGIN BANDMATES ARE WALKING RIGHT NEXT TO HIM! Do they not count?

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me well, and these two guys but never mind them my shallow heart's the only ...

	Here's Gronkjaer now. That's a very good ball, along the turf for Bridge. In to Gudjohnsen, and back again to Bridge! Chelsea have taken a massive step towards the Champions League semifinals! Wayne Bridge the scorer, and Ranieri, i have never seen him as animated as that!
	Well i just said, i can't believe the tide could turn as much as it has. The second half they've been fantastic. Give, get the pass back, and it's a magnificent finish from Wayne Bridge. He doesn't get very many. Full marks to Gudjohnsen, a little dink ball back. Fantastic by Chelsea, what a second half. Look at the celebration from Ranieri, that's how much it meant to him!
	And it's all over at Highbury! Arsenal a few days ago were looking at the treble, now it's just the championship. And Ranieri will make sure that they're gonna have a battle and a half for that as well! You can fully understand the joy of the celebrations for Chelsea. What a night for Chelsea Football Club!

I really dig the new iPod Photo. Apart from continued growth of the iPod hard drive (up to 60GB now, although my 135GB mp3 collection has long since passed that figure), the color screen is a nice addition. I don't see myself using it for photos so much, but as someone who's spent an inordinate amount of time adding album art to every single one of my 27,479 mp3s, i'm thrilled to see an iPod that can display it while playing a track. It'd be great to have in the car, so i don't have to keep burning cd's. Now to convince myself to shell out $599 plus tax.

I've lambasted Nintendo in the past regarding my disapproval of their business practices ... too many kids games, not enough inclusion of third party developers, lack of online support, reliance on a few trademark franchises, bizarre technology choices. What's the point of the GameCube's 8cm optical disks? Why be different when you're obviously losing game data space by not using standard size disks (1.5GB versus 4.7-8.5GB for the DVD media of the PlayStation2 and Xbox)? Anyhow, i must say that the new GameBoy Advance DS looks pretty nifty. Dual screens, the bottom one being touch sensitive, built-in wireless support ... looks like the big N is poised to further monopolize the handheld gaming market. Despite Sony's success with the PlayStation (capitalizing on many of the Nintendo gaffes above), i don't think their forthcoming PS portable will significantly challenge the omnipresent GameBoy.

Arjen Robben scored one and set up another in the Netherlands' World Cup qualifying match against Andorra yesterday. So that's five goals in five matches (including Premiership, Carling Cup, Champions League, and World Cup qualifying). Brilliant. It's still early in the season, but i am friggin ecstatic he's putting in these kind of performances for Chelsea.

Buying a house will suck all your energy away. Like laying out in the summer sun. Since closing escrow, the headaches have shifted from the financial to the logistic. I always knew we owned a ton of crap, but not until sizing up our move did i realize just how much a house with a garage had enabled our packrat lifestyle. Also, V has drawn up a list of initial modifications and/or repairs for the house, including having the foundation inspected and bolted down, getting a new stove, installing a damper in the chimney, and repairing the water-damaged bathroom floor. Ack. Okay, enough whining. I'm happy to be buying a house. I'm just tired. So tired. I'm thinking about taking the second two weeks of December off from work. That would overlap with the holidays, and give me a chance to recharge my near-empty batteries.

In other news, V and i saw the Jude Law remake of Alfie with Naomi and Geoff a few weeks back. I'm not sure how i felt about it. I've never seen the Michael Caine original, despite its status as a mod classic. I'm no huge fan of Law, but he suited the role of a hopeless womanizer nicely. I don't think the story translates well to this generation ... the flaws of Alfie's behavior are now common knowledge, which makes it difficult to identify with his personal realization that treating women as conquests is not fulfilling. Most adults in this day and age came to that understanding long ago. I was pleased that Hollywood chose not to tack a happy ending on the film, but was still not totally satisfied with the movie as a whole. However, that didn't stop me from asking my barber to give me Alfie's mussed hairstyle when i saw him last Monday. I'm still figuring out how to use the "sumotech" product he gave me, but in general i'm happy with the results.

Last week was a frenzy of activity at work as Art Boyer (my division chief) asked me to reshape a few old grants into a new one to be submitted by yesterday. The project, adding a collimator to a small animal CT scanner to allow it to deliver conformal radiation therapy, is one that greatly interests me. Art and i recently arranged for the new Stanford microCT scanner to be installed in our clinic space so we can make the modifications and test the unit. Suffice it to say that preparing this grant turned into a big debacle. The evening before the submission deadline i received an email from GE informing me they would be unable to organize the support needed for the grant by the Tuesday submission deadline, effectively killing the grant. Never have i been more thrilled to get bad news. The text i generated will be used in a future submission, but thankfully for now i am free.

Outside of house and work, it's been video games and Chelsea. Having been hooked on Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas for the past few weeks, a week ago Tuesday i talked Veronica into letting me buy the brand-spanking new Halo 2 for the Xbox (i'd been writing a lot of perl scripts to help her at work, so i'd earned it). Now GTASA has been cast aside to blast some Covenant scum with dual-wielded plasma rifles. In many ways the single player mode of Halo 2 is an extension of the original ... no major changes, just fine-tuned. The addition of double-wielding is a nice improvement, and the story so far is a more compelling affair than the incomprehensible plotline of the first. I haven't gone online with it yet, but am looking forward to it once i move and get my home network in working order again.

The games keep coming too ... Metroid Prime 2 Echoes, Viewtiful Joe 2, and Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater were all released this week. I've halted my video game acquisitions until i bring GTASA and Halo 2 to a close. But by then, who knows what stack of suitors will be vying for my gaming attention?

Since being ignominiously defeated by Manchester City during the SMFA weekend, Chelsea have responded by reeling off eight straight wins, scoring four three times in that span. That included two Champions League victories giving us a perfect 12 points through the first four group phase matches, and a hard-fought 1-nil triumph over third-placed Everton that moved us top of the Premiership table, two points ahead of the Arse. The team that at the start of the season was ridiculed as "boring, boring Chelsea" are now putting together mesmerizing performances and destroying opponents. Best of all, Dutch starlet Arjen Robben has now scored in four consecutive matches, with each strike more impressive than the last. Against Newcastle in the Carling Cup, he left three defenders in his wake on a run that started at midfield. Then to outdo that, in the West London derby he bamboozled four Fulham defenders, leaving two flat on their asses, on his way to rifling a shot into the net. To close the match, he and Tiago then played one-two down the left side, ending with Robben at the end line executing a perfect back-heel to Tiago in space, allowing him to fire across the keeper into the goal. That had the commentators exclaiming in delight at the quality of football. Boring boring Chelsea my ass. You think Manchester United, in the midst of their current goal drought, are kicking themselves for making a near-insulting offer to PSV Eindhoven for Arjen last winter? Add to Robben's emergence the guile and pace of Damien Duff, the imperious Frank Lampard, the steel curtain of John Terry, Ricardo Carvalho, and William Gallas, and soon-to-be-returning hitman Didier Drogba, and the Blues are ready to make some noise.

Wanna know something? I'm a bad doctor. I'm not boasting. I mean, who would? Just stating a fact, that I've never really gotten the hang of the whole "healing the sick" thing. And don't interpret this as some sort of false modesty. No, I'm homogeneously unqualified to practice medicine in any capacity. I really don't have a clue. And no one could be more shocked than me that I've been allowed to rise to a position of such importance and responsibility. I guess it all started in high school where I was a very bad science student. One day when we were supposed to be dissecting a frog, I accidentally disassembled my desk. Oh, but, you know, I was a popular kid. You know, the other students were always eager to help me out. So you know, during a test whenever I'd get that confused look on my face - which was invariably - well, the cheat notes would just start flying. Even the teachers would start whispering answers, you know, "*cough* mitochondria". But I didn't worry about it. I figured, how far could you coast on charm? Well, pretty far actually!

They just offered me the job of Chief of Surgery. Apparently, I've logged more hours in surgery than any other man my age. Four thousand hours this year alone. What no one seems to have noticed is that it was all with the same patient. Oh, I want to show you something. You know what this is? Urine! Another man's urine! I ask for it, and they give it to me! I don't know what to do with it! I've got a fridge full of the stuff. I mean, I suppose I could send it out to the lab, but they'd only send back a lot of test results that I couldn't possibly understand.

The only thing I'm actually sorta good at is referrals. You know that thing where doctors send patients to other doctors. Well, I'm the king of referrals. What I do is I call the ... uh ... the sick person into my office, and I stare for a long time really seriously at a blank sheet of paper. Then I say, "Hmmm. I'd like you to see someone. He's a specialist in this area". There are specialists who have their whole career based on my referrals. I am the cornerstone of a medical empire.

Well, I really should be going. I've gotta tell the family that the patient didn't make it. The hardest part of being a doctor. I think!

I've got so much music on my computer that i have no idea when i'm going to listen to it all. 71.6 days is a long time. I'm just waiting for the day iTunes picks something out for me and i don't even remember why i picked it up in the first place.

"Barry Manilow? How the hell did this get here?!?"

Hasn't happened yet, but it will.

Come this past Monday morning, still laid up at home with a nasty cold, i found that Tivo had recorded The Animatrix on the Cartoon Network on Halloween night. Just as i'd instructed it to do ten days earlier, thankfully Tivo has a better memory than i do. The cutely titled film is a collection of nine animated shorts revolving around the world depicted by the brothers Wachowski in the Matrix movies. I still think those flicks are classic sci-fi, although Revolutions spent entirely too much time in Zion and not nearly enough time in the Matrix. Anyhow, like their source material, the components of the Animatrix have their ups and downs. The two part "Second Renaissance" gives an interesting background of the history of human-machine relations that led to the cataclysmic war. "Kid's Story" is a fairly ho hum account of a teenager's realization of the Matrix, made enthralling by the sketchy, art book animation style. However, there's also duds like "Beyond", a boring haunted house-type yarn about a house where the Matrix is faulty, and the failed Matrix detective story, aptly titled "Detective Story". But on the whole a nifty slice of anime and some interesting thoughts on the Matrix mythology.

And The Venture Brothers just keeps getting better. When i saw "Tag Sale - You're It!" a few weeks ago i'd found my new favorite episode ... supervillains attending Dr. Venture's yard sale to get discount laser death rays is priceless. Not to mention the Monarch and Dr. Girlfriend debating the sexuality of that guy from Depeche Mode. The next week i had a new favorite in "Past Tense", but the week after it was back to the hilarious Monarch and his breakup with his second in command Dr. Girlfriend. The references in this show are fantastic, particularly in the latter episode where the Monarch is thumbing through a tell-all biography written without his knowledge by one of his henchmen: "Why, there's even pictures! Here's one of me at Danceteria making out with Stiv Bators and Lydia Lunch!". You go, Cartoon Network. And keep the Family Guy coming too.

And i thought "American Idiot" was bad ... the new Green Day single "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" makes it look like Hotel F@$#ing California. How many different ways can Billy Joe say he's alone? Let's see ...

1. "I walk a lonely road" ... check.
2. "... but it's home and i walk alone" ... got it, you're alone.
3. "... i walk this empty street" ... yes, it's empty! You're alone!
4. "... my shadow's the only one that walks beside me" ... so ... that would make you ... alone?
5. "... till then i'll walk alone" ... grrrr.
6. ... oh, f@$# it.

As if that's not bad enough, i think he rips off about eight different Johnny Cash songs over the course of three minutes. Ack.

I'm basically resigned now to the fact that we've got to sit through another four years of Bu**sh**. Better kiss abortion goodbye since in all likelihood Dubya will get to appoint between two and four Ashcroft-esque religious nutjobs to the Supreme Court. And don't bank on gay rights advancing in this country anytime in the near future. Also, might want to visit a national park soon ... might be your last chance to see one free of mining operations. And add foreign travel to your to-do list, before the rest of the world starts the "I hate Americans" club. Bad news people, bad news.

On to brighter subjects ... as you may have surmised since the title of house photo album has changed from "Our new house (hopefully)" to "Our new house", we got the house. We closed escrow last Friday, and our realtor Joe dropped the keys off with me while i suffered with a sinus infection. The sellers will live there until the end of November, so we've got a month to say goodbye to the San Mateo Village. I'll miss it here ... i'll always remember walking Cobi around the neighborhood on Saturday mornings and holding the first SMFA Cup.

Speaking of video games, the new FIFA 2005 is good, but it hasn't been able to hold my attention since Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas came out. Rockstar has hit another one out of the park. Detractors will point to the still blocky graphics, pop up, and less than brilliant AI, but they can't claim that it's not a totally immersive experience. San Andreas covers an unbelievable area and includes reasonable representations of Los Angeles (ie, Los Santos), San Francisco (ie, San Fierro), and Las Venturas (ie, Las Vegas). And each is separated by an expanse of wilderness pockmarked by a few small towns, so that getting from one city to another involves a lengthy drive through the country. I've got my banger outfitted in blonde cornrows, gold chains, and Timberlands, always ready to throw down with his SMG should a few Ballas find themselves in the wrong neighborhood. Booyakasha. God knows what sort of video game time-sharing i'm going to have to put in place when Halo 2 comes out next week.

Chelsea put the embarassing loss to the Mancs behind them, stringing together back to back four goal performances in the Premiership against Blackburn and West Brom (the cellar dwellers, but four goals is four goals), as well as back to back wins in the Champions League giving us a perfect four for four start to our European campaign. Better yet, Arjen Robben has returned from his ankle injury to put in several glittering performances, validating his enormous potential. Better still, Damien Duff has for the second year running emphatically underlined his case for a starting spot by demonstrating the kind of spark he can provide to the squad. And best of all, we've proven we can field a truly frightening attacking team featuring Duff, Lampard, and Robben together. Add a healthy Drogba to the mix and the Arse better watch the f@$# out.