Actual, verbatim dialog uttered behind me on my Caltrain ride to the city:

I'm not really into football.

Maybe if you had played in high school. I was a great linebacker. I'll never forget that game where i got three sacks.

Cool, man. I was good at baseball. And i was a really good swimmer.

Yeah, i was a really strong swimmer.

Were you on a team?

No, i was in a class. But i was super fast. I did some weight training too.

Yeah, believe it or not i was a really good weight lifter. Did you ever do that ... what was that thing ... climb the rope in gym class?

Ted commentary: this next line, i shit you not, was actually said:
Dude, i was the king of climbing the rope.

If they had just pulled out their penises and a ruler they could've saved each other about 10 minutes.

When asked what strikers i would buy and what strikers i would let go if i was in José Mourinho's shoes, money was no object (which is almost the case), and money could override any other transfer obstacles ...

I really like Andriy Shevchenko. That guy is deadly. Departing would be Mateja Kezman, as well as Hernan Crespo and Juan Veron who are already out on loan. Didier Drogba is doing a lot of whining for someone who didn't exactly light up the score sheets last season, but I think he will stay and will improve. He's a beast in the air and Mourinho just needs to get a good foil for him up front so he's not reduced to leading the attack by receiving long ball after long ball.

I like Samuel Eto'o a lot but 1) he must friggin' hate Chelsea after the Champions League incident, and 2) he's a prime case where stellar performances on the continent may not translate to a goal flood in England. I don't know much about Adriano but I fear the same problems in adapting to the English game.

The other two strikers I would rate very highly are Thierry Henry (should be raring to go next year after his spate of injuries) and Wayne Rooney (I've come down on him in the past but the guy has undeniable talent, is at least partially established in England, and is only going to get better as he enters his twenties). Prying either of them from our domestic rivals would surely ruffle feathers and add to the imperialistic image at Stamford Bridge.

Final verdict ... I would have four Chelsea strikers. Keeping Eidur Gudjohnsen and Drogba, I would add Rooney and Shevchenko. I like that group, especially with service from Damien Duff, Arjen Robben, Frank Lampard, and Joe Cole in midfield.

More likely? Gudjohnsen, Drogba, and Adriano. I think we need a fourth as we need a more productive pair up front so as not to be tied to a 4-5-1 with Robben and Duff just behind the striker (that works very well but if Robben and/or Duff go down we suffer).