Got an advance copy of the new David Cross live comedy cd It's Not Funny. The title is totally wrong. Newest giggle inducer:

I don't think Osama bin Laden sent those planes in to attack us because he hated our freedom. I think he did it because of our support for Israel, and our ties with the Saudi family, and all our military bases in Saudi Arabia. You know why i think that? Because THAT'S WHAT HE FUCKING SAID! Are we a nation of six year-olds? Answer: yes. "Why did the bad man put the plane in the building?" "Because he hated freedom."

V and i went to see Sparks at the Independent (formerly the Justice League) in SF last Friday. After a nice dinner at old favorite Pomelo, we headed over to Divisadero only to find parking a major headache. Veronica was antsy to get inside and not miss anything, so i dropped her off and continued my search. One good thing did happen while endlessly circling looking for bare curb: i identified the bizarre and wonderful SF radio station 87.9FM. Driving around for an hour gave me a chance to hear not only Operation Ivy and Minor Threat but also several funny station IDs, including one guaranteeing that you won't get arrested for DUI while listening to Pirate Cat Radio. After getting home i found they have a website, and are broadcasting at low power to San Francisco and parts of Oakland. More power to them!

Anyhoo, i did finally find parking and went inside. Veronica was already significantly peeved at the collection of bozos assembled to relive their glory years through Sparks. They were also, i might add, the worst smelling collection of showgoers i've ever encountered. Sparks came on around 10:40pm and played their latest album Lil' Beethoven straight through. Not my cup o' tea. The lyrics of the first song repeated "I am the rhythm thief, say goodbye to the beat, oh no, where did the groove go?" ad nauseum. Other repetitive and pseudo-witty song concepts included "Why are all these bands so angry?" and "How do you get to Carnegie Hall? Practice, man, practice!" They took a short interval and came back for a more conventional set comprised of their past hits, including "Mickey Mouse", "Cool Places", and "Number One Song In Heaven". Despite my penchant for new wave, Sparks have never really been on my radar. Their show didn't do much to change that. Other than the fact that a chorus of "I am the rhythm thief, say goodbye to the beat" is now echoing incessantly through my head. I also didn't know that Robert Crumb played keyboards for Sparks. That guy scares the s@$t out of me.

We had a nice Easter at Auntie Cathy's, sandwiched in between the demise of Chelsea's Premiership title challenge over a draw against Boro on Saturday and a loss to Villa on Monday. We were five points clear of United, but now they can draw level with us in second place if they win their two games in hand. Second is important as the third place finisher has to play in the qualifying rounds to enter the European club championship, so we'd better not take our foot off the gas in the Premiership just yet. However, top priority now should definitely be our upcoming duel with Monaco in the semifinals of the very winnable Champions League.