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My parents got me a Monty Python daily 2004 calendar for my desk for Christmas. We're only 6 days into the new year, and i can't stop friggin laughing. They split a sketch up over several days, so the jokes just keep building. I wasn't even familiar with this bit.
January 2
Prince: My congratulations, Wilde! Your latest play is a great success. The whole of London's talking about you.
Oscar Wilde: There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.
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January 3/4
Wilde: Your majesty, have you met James McNeill Whistler?
Prince: Yes, we've played squash together.
Wilde: There is only one thing worse than playing squash together, and that is playing it by yourself ... I wish I hadn't said that.
James Whistler: You did, Oscar, you did.
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January 5
Wilde: Your majesty is like a big jam doughnut with cream on the top.
Prince: I beg your pardon?
Oscar: Um ... it was one of Whistler's.
Whistler: I never said that.
Oscar: You did, James, you did.
Whistler: ... Well, Your Highness, what I meant was that, like a doughnut, um, your arrival gives us pleasure and your departure makes us hungry for more.
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January 6
Whistler: Your Highness, you are also like a stream of bat's piss.
Prince: What?
Whistler: It was one of Wilde's. One of Wilde's.
Wilde: It sodding was not! It was Shaw!
Bernard Shaw: I ... I merely meant, Your Majesty, that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around is dark.
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